No matter how much you want to it to remain in control, life has a strange way of doing things. Yes, maybe you have a degree of control - guiding it so that it's the way you want it to be, but it wraps around us like silky snakes, distracting us from what we think we know, luring us into its lair, confusing us, confounding us and we're standin there dazed, nauseated and wondering what just happened? - this year has been like that.
I've thrown so many tantrums and screaming fits. Complaining. Whinging. Then realising that despite doing all that I'm just wasting my time and really just procrastinating from what I know I will eventually will do, because it's always in my nature to achieve, and to not leave things undone.. no not undone, not done to the best of my ability. So I studied. I passed. Became the pharmacist that I've been studying the last 5 years for. and, Life flew by, in the means of tantrums, fine dinings, studying, working and sleeping at 2am.
I started 2009 opening a new chapter - starting my internship at a hospital and I ended 2009 on the 31st of December, finishing at the hospital, where i learnt to love the people that I've worked with, whether it be the other pharmacists, the pharmacy assistants, the dietician, the OT, the social worker, the nurses and the doctors. I will miss them. But I've closed that chapter, only to find that the new chapter I've opened is of a brand new white page, from an untouched, unspoiled diary made from moleskin (red in colour).
2010 - is going to be year where I will regain my life, where I will finally do the things I want to, and have been putting off doing.
My resolution is one of the same as all the others - you know the whole mantra - lose weight.
But it is also different in the since that I will be flying. Whether it'd be metaphorically or literally (sense of a plane), because I have my life back and I will make it the way I want it to be.
I will stare at the sky for hours - looking at the clear blue skies on a cloudless day or making cloud animals when fluffy white clouds come out to play.
I will take my baby Nikon D90 out for play and take extraordinary photos - NOT on auto-mode but manual.
I will master a foreign language - maybe start with Mandarin seeing as I am Chinese.
I will volunteer more - just so that I feel like I'm giving back to the world and to stop being so angry at it.
I will be healthier - eat healthier, take up a sport and pilates again.
I will learn to ballroom dance - because it'd be fun and a way to stay active.
I will discover more people and reconnect with the ones I've somewhat haven't made such an effort to stay connected with.
and in all that maybe I will find someone - that is if I have time. After all life is to be enjoyed and if you meet that someone, it's nice to share the experiences, if not, I'm not too fussed because 2010 I'll be too busy having fun and living life. Spreading my wings to other areas of my life I've been dying to do but have been putting off. After all living isn't all about money (having it is nice of course!) or working or both, but it's all about balance.
2010 BRING IT ON!
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